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Writer's pictureHumanity Wonders

3 things parents should not say to their introvert kid

Updated: Jan 21, 2022

Often, parents say statements that can hurt their introvert kid and which can make their introvert kid feel low on confidence. Parents say it with good intentions but the child takes it negatively and becomes less confident. There are many labels parents should not label their kids with, but in this blog, there are the top 3 labels which can lower their confidence. So, I am sharing with you an article on 3 statements that parents should avoid saying it to their introvert kid. Avoid these statements and use better ones for them to show more confidence.


1. Don't be so shy!

Many a times, when introvert kids go to social gatherings, they tend to avoid eye contact, hide behind the parent’s back, stay alone. There is nothing wrong with them when they do this. It is just their shy personality where they are scared from the world and that’s why they prefer to stay alone. When parents say - “Don’t be so shy!”, at any situation, problem or place, it lowers their confidence and creates something called “fear factor” in them. Fear factor is a state of mind in which the introvert kid feels of not doing something and can discourage them. Introvert kids have the quality of being shy, but parent’s problem is that they become confident, so instead of saying - “Don’t be so shy!” Or “Stop being so shy”, they should accept their personality and instead work upon how they can become confident. If you want your introvert kid to become confident, you can buy our book and journal - Confident Introvert Kid. So basically, avoid saying “Don’t be so shy!” as you are stopping them from being who they are not.


2. Go mix up with other kids

I love staying alone or enjoying one to one and I also enjoy being in groups sometimes. Same it is with other introvert kids, solitude is their main activity instead of socialising. When you ask an introvert that if they prefer solitude or socialising, their answer is always solitude and so is mine. At any type of party or wedding, parents often say “Go mix up with other kids” where the introvert kid’s confidence is again lowered as they like being alone more. They also can’t say no as they don’t have the courage and confidence to say it, so instead of forcing them to play with other kids, understand them and observe what exactly they enjoy at social gatherings instead of socialising. Don’t completely encourage them staying alone all the time as then they will stay in their comfort zone. Social activities are important for everyone, so instead of pressurising them a lot, ask them to try and play with other kids and socialise again if they enjoy it. So, don’t say - “Go mix up with other kids”, understand and observe what they exactly want to do and afterwards ask them to participate in social activities.


3. Start talking it will help you a lot

While one of an introvert kid’s qualities is to stay quiet and speak less, parents tell them “Start talking it will help you a lot” with good intentions, but this statement can actually lower their confidence. Being someone you are not and faking it can make you personality and soul, both weak and poor. If you want your introvert kid to interact more, then instead of saying this statement - Start talking it will help you a lot, understand who they really are and try to work upon how they can become more confident. Create an environment where they can share what they feel, who they are and gradually you will see who your child really is. Compliment your child instead of finding faults in them. Criticise them when needed but don’t say something that can make their personality and heart soar.

So these are the 3 main statements you should avoid saying it to your introvert kid. Try doing it and see the confidence they gain!

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